Just this evening, Hector and I had a great opportunity to attend a Sibling Workshop led by two experts in the field of sibling relationships in families with special needs. Dr. Brian Skotko and Sue Levine led the workshop and I feel so lucky that DSIA flew them out to Sacramento to speak with a small group of us. Diego was able to attend the breakout session for children ages 5-8 and then childcare was provided while Hector and I attended the parent session.
It was so informative and Diego also really enjoyed having his session with some peers experiencing the same thing he is. I think Sue validated the kids feelings no matter what they were and helped them to process having a sibling with DS. The kids expressed their feelings and also shared advice to their parents. It was really eye opening to see the things they said on their brainstorming papers. Things like "Pay attention to us too" and "Let the baby rest sometimes" and "Be fair" and "Have a baby with DS". This last one Sue and Brian mentioned is really interesting. They have collectively been doing this type of thing for 35 years and they said in the last 5 years more and more often kids (and really young ones) are talking about prenatal decisions and choices. So when the kids said "Have a baby with DS", they meant that they feel babies with DS are wonderful and they want them in their lives. Interesting!
One of the best tidbits of the night was a tip on how to explain how or why an extra chromosome can make such a difference in people. Sue mentioned this "recipe" was one way a mom in one of her previous sessions explains it so that even young kids can understand....
Chromosomes are ingredients that make us who we are and it's like the ingredients in a cake. All cakes are made with flour, sugar, eggs, some vanilla and some oil in our cake batter and we bake it in the oven and out comes a yummy, delicious cake. Having an extra chromosome is like adding in an extra egg or maybe a little extra oil. You still get a yummy, delicious cake but this cake might be a little softer, spongier or stickier but it's still a yummy delicious cake.
I thought this was a GREAT way to explain it...not to mention it kicked in my sweet tooth!
Thank you Sue and Dan for an awesome afternoon and thank you DSIA for hosting them.
Living life one day at a time as a family of six...3 busy and bouncy boys and 1 Ukrainian princess. Our third son Joaquin was our unexpected blessing who came to us with a little something extra called Down syndrome and inspired us to adopt Sofia an orphan we fell in love with through Reece's Rainbow. We hope that our story will help open people's eyes to the beauty and gift that ALL children are. We are all more alike than different!
SO glad it was a good workshop... I'm bummed we had to miss it. I know we don't have a sibling for Sheridan yet. But we thought it would be a good idea to take part to start learning now :) Now I'm hungry for cake.
ReplyDeleteLucky you! I'd love to attend a meeting with them! Nice advice, too.
ReplyDeleteWhat a great workshop! I think that last one, " Have a baby with Ds" is interesting too. The other day my Bella who is seven, announced she wanted a baby with special needs when she is a mommy.
ReplyDeleteThanks for this as I am constantly trying to explain or help my older boys explain Down syndrome to their peers,in easy terms or them .This recipe is perfect ... just like our children.
ReplyDeletethat is so adorable and clever! I am going to use that analogy for sure!
ReplyDeleteI love that way to explain Ds. I will totally use that when I talk to kids about Ds. I really wrestled about whether to squeeze that event into our tightly compacted Saturday and we just couldn't do it. I can see Anna saying "Have a baby with Ds" She amazes me daily. I'll share a letter she wrote to our principal when I see you. So glad you went! i want to hear more.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your experience. What a wonderful way to explain Ds to siblings. Our three have not talked anything about it. Not sure why, but someday there will be questions and the cake recipe is going to be a great way to share that information. Would you mind if I use the cake recipe on our post sometime?
ReplyDeleteAlso wondering about more "I Did It" t-shirts.
Rachel
how awesome that you were able to go to that workshop! glad diego enjoyed his session too!!! thanks for sharing the "brainstorming" the kids did as well as the chromosome cake analogy!!! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for sharing this as Blyss has been having some difficult times with all the medical attention Wysdom gets and has really started to act out. We have bought a book called "The Other Kid" which is a workbook for her to draw in. If you are interested in it just let me know and I will find the authors name. She is 3 and it's a bit to old for her. I love the recipe idea.
ReplyDeleteWhat a fabulous workshop! Wonderful advice!
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this. It is so helpful to hear some advice in how to talk to siblings.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing! I have a 7 year old who is also starting to ask questions. The cake recipe is going to come in handy. Just enough info to understand and pass on to his peers. My 4 year old is not quite there yet! Landon is now 9 months old and boys still can't get enough of him!
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad you were able to go to their presentation. Aren't they amazing?!? And wonderful that there was a session for Diego, too. Sounds like you all got alot out of it!
ReplyDeleteSounds cool! I like the recipe idea too.
ReplyDeleteI took this workshop at the convention. I loved this idea!
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