First Day of School Jitters...for the Mama!

Joaquin has his first official day of full inclusion preschool tomorrow morning at 8:30am and I'm a nervous wreck. We have been looking forward to this day since he turned 3 in February. This is what we have always wanted for him...to have the same preschool experience that any typical child would have. The same that his brothers had at this age.  Joaquin is social, easy going, very flexible, enjoys learning and loves people so why am I nervous?

Well, I wasn't nervous until I went to the "meet the teacher" day on Tuesday. I was greeted warmly by the teachers and everyone was very excited to see Joaquin. The teachers (all 3 of them) said they have been looking forward to Joaquin attending the preschool. I picked up the preschool newsletter and the calendar of activities planned and made sure that Joaquin would be on the roster and we happily went home. I eagerly sat down to read through all the paperwork, so thrilled for Joaquin, and then it hit me. I read that one of the first activities next week is to bring in a photograph of your family to share with the class. Oh my gosh. How is Joaquin going to share with the class? He can't talk. It hit me. I mean sure, he can identify each of us in the photograph with prompting and I'm sure he will smile and point at his family members but that's about it. Typical three year olds talk. Some talk A LOT. But I'm certain every child in that room will be able to talk about their family. Joaquin won't. I get teary eyed just thinking about it.

I know I'm doing the right thing. I know Joaquin will learn best from his typical peers and he will learn best to TALK from his typical talkative peers. But it's still hard and it hits you.

Deep breaths as we cross this bridge into new territory. Typical peers. Peers where the difference in abilities will be VERY evident. Painful at times. But it's the best for Joaquin because this is REAL life. Not the safety bubble that special ed provides. Special Ed has a place and a time but I see now how easy it would be to crawl back to the safety net of it. BRAVE. Must be brave. Joaquin deserves this opportunity and I'm certain he will handle it WAY better than I will. Deep breaths.

Things That Make You Go "Hmmmmm"

We're not sure who is to blame here but we got a new piece of furniture and not 10 minutes after the delivery guys left I turned around and saw this...

Yes, that is Sofia inside a glass cabinet. She was all giggles and smiles and Joaquin was one foot away from it...hmmmmmm...

The Healing Smile

A post from Hector:

This morning when I woke up I went to check my email and there was a message from a comment posted on Sofia's old blog. It brought tears to my eyes, it read:

hello, my name is Michelle and I saw you (Jen) today at the twelve bridges park. I was having a hard day thinking of my miscarriage and how I would be having the baby any day if nothing had happened. Your little joaquin looked at me and gave me a beautiful smile that just melted my heart. I heard you call out Sofia's name and something rang a bell. I thought maybe I had read an article about you guys on kidaround. I went home and looked you up! How amazing that little Sofia is now with you guys! You guys were a ray of sunshine in my sad day. I know God sent you guys to that park today, and He showed his love to me through your angels!

Every day when I wake up in the morning or I get back from work at night, Joaquin's smile melts my heart as well. He has that effect on people, he demands hugs from mostly everyone known or unknown. I still hold my breath for a second or two when it happens with strangers, and every time his smile wins, and he will not let anyone off the hook that easy. Moms will want to hold him until he's had enough, dads will do it for a minute or two and then as they try to put him down he will hold on for a little bit more. He needs to rub his hands on their cheeks and feel the prickly beard on the back of his little hands. And most of the time they give in to his request to be held and enjoy this little baby bear cub embrace. And I have to tell you, it is the most wonderful embrace you've ever known.

 Some of you know about the GQ fiasco that happened recently. I did my part and sent a letter to the editor expressing my opinion and telling him I won't be patronizing his magazine anymore unless they made things right. I've been a subscriber for many years and I asked them to issue a public apology and write an article or have special coverage on Down syndrome. How about Joaquin on the cover?   I understand that as part of the Down syndrome community I am constantly on edge about insensitive remarks and the use of the "R" word, but my outrage about what was printed goes beyond sensitivity.  It was probably the worst insult I've ever heard. It would take me a thousand pages to describe how wrong it was, but I'm over it. It is obvious that the guy who wrote it has never known someone with Down syndrome. Or perhaps he is plain and simple  an insensitive asshole.

Joaquin and Sofia's story along with all the beautiful children of The Sisterhood and the many more we are blessed to know are changing lives one smile at a time.

And now some eye candy...

I Hope You Dance

Here is Sofia with my dad, her Grandpa, at my brother's wedding this weekend. All our kids ADORE music and dancing so we love a good wedding!

Weddings always remind me of what is most important in this life. To love and embrace life...to dance. Life is so busy right now and hectic and stressful. Raising four kids (all under the age of 8) is a lot of work but I'm not complaining. We feel so blessed. We have four healthy and happy kids and we will never take that for granted.

Rub a dub dub...

...three boys in a tub!

Summer Buzz Time

Every summer I BUZZ the boys...it's so hot in Sacramento and I secretly wish I could do the same with my own hair. We even got Diego and Mateo's best buddy Chandler in on the action!

Best of all, check out Joaquin's straight eyes. The surgery was a success with only some residual "outward" turning of his right eye when he is tired which should correct itself in time. That eye was probably overcorrected during surgery but it's minor at this point. His vision remains excellent so no need for glasses. It was interesting that Dr. O'Hara relayed to me during our post op appointment that they have done psychological research on how people perceive eyes. When people see a strabismus (cross eyes or a turning in of the eyes), people immediately assume the individual is not smart...in fact she used the word "dumb". For eyes that turn outward or are straight, that assumption is not made. Interesting? Anyway, this is sometimes why people push for the surgery to straighten the eyes. This wasn't our primary reason for doing the surgery. Our primary reason was based on Dr. O'Hara's recommendation that Joaquin was a good candidate and that he could have improved depth perception. But I will admit that the secondary reason for having it done was for social acceptance and cosmetic reasons. Whatever the reason, the surgery worked and Joaquin recovered beautifully and we have no regrets.

Annual Checkup!

It was time for our annual check-up and we are happy to report that we are growing and thriving! Only 3 pounds separates the two of us (despite being almost exactly one year apart!) so we are often mistaken for twins. We LOVE each other so very much and get into constant trouble around the house! Thank goodness one of us is in school almost every day otherwise mama would be going crazy by now chasing and cleaning up after the two of us.

Mama says she PROMISES to be better about posting! Life sure is busy with 4 rambunctious and very busy kiddos! Having three boys ages 8, 6 and 3 is a handful and add one feisty 2 year old princess and well...we have a FULL house.

Check back in again soon! So many new things going on with the Sanchez Six (yes...mama and papa round us out to 6 silly Sanchez family members!)